Leslie Nipps Counseling

We teach what we most need to learn.

The day was foggy, cold and windy, and a horse was bucking in circles on his lunge line a few feet away. Everything in me was expecting my normally calm—but not bomb-proof—horse to start prancing, jigging and jumping. He had every right to, given the circumstances. Why had I even tried this? It was my first ride in two months, still healing from my first ever, incredibly painful and frightening, herniated disc. I could not risk being bounced around (much less thrown off). My horse had to walk, and only walk. And here I was, completely tempting fate.

And yet, I took the risk. I dared to trust him, and life. I dared to trust that I was ready, and that I am a good enough rider, truly, to ask my horse to calmly walk when I need him to, and succeed.

And we did.

I learned not simply that I can trust. Okay, that’s a pretty simplistic lesson. It’s that life is regularly, almost daily, offering me experiences that remind me that trust is the most useful and truthful stance toward life. Life reaches back out in trustworthy acts.

We teach what we most need to learn.

I discovered this as I grew as a preacher in my former career as an Episcopal minister. My best sermons were never about the issues about which I had clarity and certainty; indeed, they tended to be boring and a tad strident, or at least pedantic. My best sermons always focused on whatever I was working on, struggling with, confused or curious about. They might sound “convincing” (and I got regular feedback of how inspiring these sermons were), but they resonated because they came from my own searching and desire. I was reaching for God (Spirit, Life, Hope, Meaning, etc.), and so the congregation could reach with me, and find what they were looking for.

Since my counseling tagline is “Trust as a Way of Life,” you can assume that is what I myself am reaching for. Trust is at the heart of the well-lived life. Without it, joy is harder to come by, we have a hard time seeking relationship, we can’t fully express our creativity and work, and we can’t help others. At the least, things feel unstable, and at the worst everything may be “out to get us.” Whatever wound we carry, whatever behavior or experience of life we would prefer not to have, distrust is some substantial contributor.

Take a minute now, and make a picture of a future version of you who trusts in exactly all the ways that you want and which would support the things you most long for in life. Notice how natural trust is to that version of you, and enjoy that one’s experience of life in the midst of such joy…

Peace, Leslie

California Hillside by Leslie Nipps

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